Sunday, February 8, 2015

Part III: Addiction

The topic of addiction is one that has come into focus for me over the past months.

There is obviously a very negative connotation with the term addiction, especially as it is a huge obstacle to righteous living.

These are my thoughts on the subject, so take them how you want, and feel free to disagree - or hopefully add to the discussion. My hope is mostly that you receive some new insight on "addiction" and "addicts."



The truth is, I feel like every single one of us is an addict. Some addictions are more obvious than others, and some are more noticeably damaging than others. But whether it is an addiction related to gossip, food, our bodies, sex/pornography/lust, drugs, alcohol, judging, cruelty, envy, pride, etc - they all stem from the same origins, and require the same steps to overcome them.

I read a few months ago a collection of essays by a recovering porn addict (he groups sex and pornography into what he calls an addiction to lust - more or less the objectification of someone to meet your selfish desires) called "Sitting in a Row Boat throwing Marbles at a Battleship." (you can download it here). It was extremely illuminating, and I invite you to please take the time to read the essays. Either it's affecting you directly, or it's affecting someone you care about, and these essays will help you understand what you or they are going through. 

Anyway, in one of the essays he talks about how we often focus on the C of addiction. That is the acting out (viewing pornography, self harming, drinking, giving into pride, etc). But what is leading us to act out are the A and B.

The A of addiction is crushing negative emotions - loneliness, self loathing, stress, resentment, frustration, boredom, etc. These things hurt. And they make us hurt. Our brains want to remove that pain - they want to self medicate and numb that pain.

The B of addiction is that numbing of the pain. Chemicals are released in our brain when we participate in our addictions that make the pain go away. That could be by viewing pornography, taking a drink, or harming ourselves. These things can start out as curiosities, but they eventually become coping mechanisms to escape from the pain we feel (pain we might not even realize we are feeling).

That leads to the C of addiction. We act out on our addiction. The relief is temporary and we often feel even worse after giving in.

Whatever our religious beliefs, let us remember that we are all on our different paths to salvation and returning to live with God. We cannot compare our journey to someone else's. What may be a challenge for us is easy for them and vice versa. But whether you're 15 or 85 the steps to recovery are the same.

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints has a program called the Addiction Recovery Program (ARP). It is patterned after the twelve step recovery program used by Alcoholics Anonymous - but it is with the focus and understanding of the Atonement and the truths of the gospel.

The 12 steps outlined in the ARP are essentially the systematic application of the Atonement in our lives. So whether you're trying to overcome an addiction to lust, an addiction to pride, or just be a little bit nicer to people, the steps are the same.

Every single one of us needs the Atonement of Jesus Christ.

You can find the steps of ARP here.

I just want to mention the first and second steps briefly: 

Step 1: Honesty - admit that you, of yourself, are powerless to overcome your addictions and that your life has become unmanageable.

Step 2: Hope - come to believe that the power of God can restore you to complete spiritual health.


The Atonement is real, and we all need it. We are all sinners who have come short of the glory of God. Let us be more aware of the struggles of those around us, and more aware of our own need for healing. Let us love each other and support each other.